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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28905822">Numb</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Icyclear/pseuds/Icyclear'>Icyclear</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Breaking Bad</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>BDSM, Drug Use, Gay Stuff, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 10:54:17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,744</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28905822</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Icyclear/pseuds/Icyclear</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jesse got himself into quite a predicament to keep Walter alive and with him in the lab. He thinks he's good at living his double life, only to realize that he has no control over anything in his life.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gustavo Fring/Jesse Pinkman, Jesse Pinkman/Walter White</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Only The Beginning</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I absolutely love Jesse, which is why he must suffer. Okay, I'm a bit of a sadist :)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was Walter White and Jesse Pinkman against the world. Partners in crime.</p><p>At least, that is what Jesse wanted to believe.  He idolized Walt. Although Jesse did not want to admit that ‘Mr. White’ meant so much to him. Why would he? Their arrangement was based on blackmail. Still, they had done so much in the months they’ve established their partnership. To Jesse, the months felt more like years. </p><p>He reminisced the beginning of cooking together. He would try not to look at Walt wearing nothing but underwear under his apron. Sometimes would sneak a peek. It wasn’t something he would normally do. Looking at a man in that way would sicken him. He was no ‘faggot’, so he believed. It would take a bit for Jesse to become attracted to the dangerous man who was once his teacher. It was what Jesse fell for, the danger was sexy and that’s what he lived for.</p><p>“Earth to Jesse.”</p><p>Jesse shook his head and ran his hand over his shaved head, “Oh, right. I was just in thought.”</p><p>“About what?” Walter asked, half interested.</p><p>Jesse thought of a quick and believable lie, “That girl I’ve been seeing.”</p><p>“Oh.” Walt responded rather dismissive.</p><p>“What do you mean, ‘oh’?” Jesse asked, somewhat pissed at Walt’s reaction, “What else do you expect me to think about?”</p><p>“Cooking, since that’s what we’re supposed to be doing!” Walt snapped, “Think of getting your dick wet on your own time.”</p><p>Jesse shrugged him off, “Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Asshole.”</p><p>                                                                                                                                    ****</p><p>Jesse watched as Walt removed the orange plastic suit off his body. Walt was always careful when it came to taking off the suit. He was usually always careful with everything he does. Jesse made sure to follow suit and removed his. Walter would catch glimpses at the younger male, though not at the same time Jesse would look at him. </p><p>'What is he thinking about?' Jesse wondered as he could feel Walt’s eyes on him. </p><p>“Same time tomorrow.” Walt said as he climbed up the stairs to leave.</p><p>Jesse just stood there. He laughed softly, “Fucking asshole.” </p><p>“Jesse, mind coming up to my office?” A voice over an intercom made Jesse wince. He hated hearing Gus’s voice, still, until they could get better footing, he and Walt worked for the madman who supplied them with such a wonderful ‘kitchen’.<br/>
</p><p>
Jesse obeyed, though he took his sweet ass time doing so.</p><p>“Mr. Pinkman, never keep me waiting ever again.” Gus told him as Jesse opened the door.</p><p>Gus’s office was decorated in navy, black, and gold. The silver laptop sat on his oak desk. A shiver ran down Jesse’s spine.</p><p>“Do you know why I called you in here, Jesse?” Gus asked, his eyes burning Jesse’s image into his memory.</p><p>“No. Mr. White and I are a head of schedule. If that was it was about.” Jesse answered.</p><p>Gus smirked, his tongue ran across his bottom lip, “That’s good. However, that’s not why I asked you in here. I can see everything that goes on in the lab, Jesse, did you know that? Of course, you did. Tell me, what is really running across your mind when you are idle for over five minutes?”</p><p>“None of your fucking business.” Jesse hissed. </p><p>Gus laughed, which made Jesse quiver, “I suppose it isn’t. I just don’t want my employees to stand there and do nothing when there’s work to be done. Understand me, Mr. Pinkman.” </p><p>“Yeah. Crystal.” Jesse responded, nearly annoyed. </p><p>“There is one other thing. I may enjoy your sass, Jesse, but you know what your place is when you are in here, do I make myself clear?”</p><p>Jesse swallowed his pride. He put his gaze to the ground, “Yes Master.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Typing this story out at work :) Hard to stay focused ;)</p><p>Hoping to stay in mind of the song that inspired the story. Numb by Linkin Park.</p><p>Also, since I don't know how meth is made, I'll keep it rather vague.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Gus had a shit eating grin on his face. Jesse shivered at what thoughts Gus had in his head. He went over to Jesse and grabbed onto his face, "You're not planning something against me, are you?"</p><p>Jesse's eyes bagged to widen, but Jesse remained his composure, "No. Why would I when you could easily kill me and Mr. White."</p><p>"That's right. You gave yourself to me to protect your precious partner." Gus laughed. He brought Jesse's face closer to his and kissed the young man hard. He fondled Jesse's cock, rubbing over his jeans. Jesse moaned with a mixture of disgust and pleasure.</p><p>Then Gus let go and took a step back, which left Jesse confused. Gus's smile faded a bit, "That's all for today."</p><p>Jesse was relieved. He didn't feel like having sex or molested that day; anymore than he was. The short run over his pants and kiss was good enough. Too good, Jesse admitted to himself. He left Gus's office and went straight to his car to get out of there before Gus changed his mind.</p><p>The urge to masturbate ran through him hard, he knew that was something to save when he got home. Thankfully home was around less a mile away. As soon as he arrived, he practically threw himself up to his bedroom and hand on shaft in no time. He didn't think of anyone, just enjoying the pleasure he was giving himself. For a split second, he wished Gus was the one playing with his cock like a joystick. </p><p>'Fuck no,' Jesse thought to himself, 'I hate him. I hate him. I fucking hate him! Then why do I want him touching me. Oh God, I'm craving him. He must never know.'</p><p>****</p><p>It was another day in the 'kitchen'. Cooking meth was never so difficult before Mr. White, whom held such high standards. </p><p>"Don't forget to check the temperatures." Walt instructed.</p><p>"Aye aye, Captain." Jesse replied sarcastically.</p><p>Both would look up at the cameras. Jesse asked with malice in his voice, "How much do you think he's watching us the whole time we're here?" He then flipped him the middle finger.</p><p>Walt looked him disapprovingly, "Don't do that! He's killed for less."</p><p>"Don't think he'll lay a finger on us since he needs us both." Jesse said, rather matter- of- factly. </p><p>Walt was suspicious of Jesse's tone, he seemed too confident in his reply. He wanted to know what Jesse exchanged for their protection, but never asked.</p><p>Like Jesse thought, Gus was watching them and he was amused, "That young man is safe for now." He was too busy thinking of what to do to Jesse for his cockiness and couldn't focus on working. Jesse did have that power over him, but that was all he had. </p><p>Despite the cameras, Jesse felt safe in the 'kitchen' with Walt than anywhere else. He could stare at Walt as much as he wanted and still work at the same time.</p><p>'He has no idea how much I want him,' Jesse thought. He rather share a bed with Walt over Gus any night. But no. Walt had no idea and Jesse made a deal with the devil; sex with Gus a few nights a week unless Gus wanted more or less; usually more.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jesse was dreading getting his ass to work. Cooking meth was fine. He loved it. It was being used as a sex object that made him ill. He considered calling Walt and saying, "Not coming in, yo." But no, he knew that if he missed any days, either Gus or Walt, maybe both, would be at his door.</p><p>When he did finally show up, he realized he was on time and the first of two to get to the 'kitchen'. He checked his watch, "Fuck. Dammit. Mr. White better get here soon or Gus will-"</p><p>"Gus will do what?" Walt had just arrived.</p><p>"Gus will have a bitch fit. You know the bastard." Jesse hissed as he lied his ass off.</p><p>Walt put his hand on Jesse's shoulder, "As you say, let's not worry about Gus. Let's just suit up and get to cooking."</p><p>"Yeah..." Jesse replied softly</p><p>****</p><p>Gus appeared in the 'kitchen' and took hold of Jesse's wrist, "Don't mind me, Walter. I just need to borrow Jesse for a little while."</p><p>Walt demanded, "For what?! I need him here!"</p><p>Gus didn't drop composure, "What I need him for isn't your concern. It will be an hour tops."</p><p>Jesse felt sick, he knew what Gus wanted him for and he rather die instead. Instead he obeyed. Jesse looked at Walt, "Just a hour. I know you'll be okay."</p><p>When Gus and Jesse arrived at Gus's office, he looked at the young man with hunger, "Strip. Take off everything."</p><p>Jesse gave him a grimace look. Gus chuckled as he sat down in his patted chair, "You should be used to this by now. Strip. Time is ticking."</p><p>Jesse did what he was told. Once he was completely naked, Gus gestured him over to the chair. Jesse slowly crawled over. He didn't want face to admit that Gus was right; he was used to this, but that didn't mean he had to like it. He hated that he liked it up the ass even more. </p><p>Gus stroked his face gently and then ordered, "Open your mouth." Jesse felt he had no choice as he opened his mouth. "You're just going to do this for the rest of the hour." He took out his cock and Jesse instinctively slid it between his lips and touched the back of his throat. Against his better judgement, he had become great at giving head. </p><p>Jesse wanted to vomit hearing Gus moan out of pleasure and telling him how great of a 'bitch' he was. Before the hour was up, Gus had came in Jesse's mouth. Jesse wiped his lips with a tissue that Gus had ever so kindly gave him. "Got any mouth wash or gum? Don't want Mr. White catching on to anything." Jesse commented.</p><p>Gus handed Jesse two pieces of mint gum, "Yeah. Someday he just might. And then what?"</p><p>"Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of." Jesse mumbled loud enough for Gus to hear.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"So what did he want to see you for that took an hour?" Walt asked as he poured liquid into a tank.</p><p>"Just business shit. You know numbers and supply." Jesse lied, though he was sure he sounded convincing. He just stood at Walt's side until he was told what Walt wanted him to do.</p><p>Walt wasn't truly convinced, he could tell in Jesse's voice, "For a hour, eh? Sure." He pretended to believe him, but he felt suspicious. He gave Jesse further instructions and worked side by side with him, getting a sniff or two of Jesse during times it seemed innocent. </p><p>When it was time to leave, Walt couldn't restrain himself any longer. He knew there wasn't cameras in the locker room and there he decided to take his chance. When Jesse took off his resperator, Walt pinned him to his locker.</p><p>"Dude, what the fuck?!" Jesse demanded.</p><p>Walt answered softly, "This." He smashed his lips onto Jesse's; kissing each other hard. Both could feel each other's stubble but neither of them minded. This was something they both wanted. Tongues explored each other's mouths with a high degree of lust. Then Jesse pushed Walt away.</p><p>"Not that I didn't like it, why did you do that, yo?" Jesse asked raspy. He was out of breath. He wiped his mouth slowly</p><p>Walt hung his head down, "I'm sorry. You're just so sexy, I couldn't help myself."</p><p>Jesse didn't believe him, "Yeah right, Sure, Mr. White."</p><p>Walt touched the young man's chest, "You didn't say no. So what is it? You like me too?"</p><p>Jesse's eyes widened, he was busted, "Yeah, I guess. So what now? What are we?"</p><p>"Partners. I guess that means two things I suppose." Walt replied with a flat tone, "Gus must never know or he'll use you against me, or worse-"</p><p>"Worse what?" Jesse pressed.</p><p>"He'll take you away from me." Walt answered with a bit of worry in his voice.</p><p>****</p><p>Jesse was on his knees, completely nude, giving Gus a spectacular blow job as he imagined giving one to Walt. 'Someday soon, ' Jesse thought. Gus moaned triumphtly, pushing on Jesse's head to go deeper on his shaft.</p><p>"Good... Good... That's so good." Gus breathed, taking hold of Jesse's brown hair. He would open his eyes just enough to look into Jesse's. The blueness of his eyes always gave chills to Gus. Blue as pale sapphires. His eyes were the sexiest part of him.</p><p>Gus then motioned Jesse to stop. He moved him aside and went to his desk drawer for lube. "Okay. On all 4s right now." Gus ordered. Jesse obeyed without a second thought, even though he hated what was about to come. Gus put some lube and preped Jesse's hole to get ready for penetration. Finally, he was ready and Gus spent no time putting himself in Jesse's ass. </p><p>Jesse held onto the carpet for support as he was fucked hard. It was hard for him to relax and it did hurt as a result; so he faked his passionate moans. It felt like forever for Gus to finish on Jesse's back. Jesse didn't come, he had no desire to do that. Gus took a baby wipe from his desk and cleaned him off. </p><p>Jesse couldn't wait to dress and get the fuck out of there. He took out a cigarette and took a long relaxing drag. What he wanted most was within grasp. Walt was right, Jesse was afraid of what could happen if Gus found out their relationship.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Walt's divorce from Skyler had been finalized and Walt couldn't be happier. He faked his emotional distress in order to manipulate her to staying with him as a cover of a happy family. In reality, it was Jesse he became who he truly wanted and in his mind, he finally got him.</p><p>He had given up his teaching career in order to keep cooking with Jesse; to spend all his time with him. What bothered him was Gus's borrowing of Jesse for an hour here and there and Jesse always got defensive with his replies to Walt's questioning. </p><p>'What could he be hiding from me?' Walt thought, 'What am I missing?'</p><p>****</p><p>Walt arrived at 'the 'kitchen' at nearly 10 am. Jesse had yet to arrive. It was nearly 10:30 when he finally showed. Walt went into the locker room as Jesse was getting into his suit. Walt took Jesse's wrist and invaded his personal space. He gave him surprise kisses, deep, hard, and sensual. </p><p>"Mr. White-" Jesse breathed</p><p>Walt stopped kissing him, "Say that again."</p><p>Jesse responded, "Mr. White."</p><p>"Mmmm, I like that." Walt purred.</p><p>They kissed again, tongues going crazy in each other's mouths; pure lust. Jesse never kissed Gus like that. Kissing Walt felt so gentle despite how hard Walt was.</p><p>"You're mine, understand?" Walt mumbled in Jesse's ear, "If I wanted, I could screw you here and Gus would never know."</p><p>Jesse was filled with excitement. He was full mast and tingly. He had to think of non sensual thoughts in order to get rid of his boner. Walt had the same problem, but he didn't care about it.</p><p>"Mr. White, we better get to work. I'm sure Gus is wondering where we are, yo." Jesse said, trying to change the subject.</p><p>"Fuck him." Walt groaned.</p><p>Jesse looked away, "Yeah. Fuck him."</p><p>Walt had no idea that his beloved pet really was being fucked by Gus and Jesse wanted it to stay that way.</p><p>****</p><p>Jesse would glance at the cameras. Gus was always watching, lurking at each recording square on his laptop screen. Jesse hissed softly, "We're no better than slaves."</p><p>"What was that?" Walt asked as he 'cooked'.</p><p>
"We're no better than slaves, yo." Jesse declared with hostility. He figured out what Walt was doing and jumped into the recipe. Jesse waited for Walt's response; only to get none, "Well?!"</p><p>
Walt stopped and turned his head to look at Jesse, "It could be a lot worse. We had worse. Count your blessings."</p><p>Jesse spat, "This isn't what I signed up for." </p>
<p>
****</p><p>
High off his ass, Jesse was able to grasp his situations. His world spun left to right, right to left, up and down. It was one hell of a trip on his futon, "I do what I must to keep Mr. White safe. I have to cook hundreds of pounds of meth to help Mr. White. Everything I am doing is for him and he has no fucking clue."</p>
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